Weary

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We are weary but we press on

For the magic that we make

We keep the lights on

Art is life and we're reproducing

After our own kind

May God bless us, protect us

And keep us

As we move toward the future

And leave the past behind.

(From an FB post in 2017)

Leave me to worship in peace

Leave me the semblance of tranquility

Allow my trembling to cease

And release the false sense of humility

Words I cannot utter from my lips

Spill from my eyes in liquid form

Betraying my guarded countenance

Whispering the pain of a heart so torn

Let me lay in His presence 

At His feet, unashamed

Arms widespread, ears wide open

I listen for Him to call my name.

Lingering Thought

I could make better use of my time

By not pretending

Everything is fine

I could make better use of my day

By not pretending

Everything is okay

I would be much more productive

Once I succeed in

Kicking out these thoughts

The ones that are intrusive

The ones that are destructive

Taking up space in my head

Making up things no one said

Creating scenes that 

Don't need to be seen

Staining the purity

Making me feel unclean

I pray for the balance

Returning to center

Rededicated to 

Getting myself together

It feels like a crime to be sad

When I can't even remember

Anything happening

In my own life that was bad

Maybe I'm slowly going mad

Existential dread is a thing, right?

Where nothing is wrong

But you can't see the light

You're afraid to open your eyes

Anxious about an unpleasant surprise

Waiting on the other side 

I heard that this is a type of grieving

But I can't afford the cost of fear

I refuse to stop believing

In the goodness I already carry

Generationally blessed

Until I'm dead and buried

My life is just a seed in the ground

In the Earth of this Universe

With every layer of concrete I face

I resolve to break through

And everything I'm longing to be

And working to do

Is manifesting properly 

At the appointed time

I rise again and again and again

I'm coming to get what's mine.